The issue of ethics has been all over the news this week with several high profile people showing how much they are lacking in it, and it got me thinking about ethics in negotiation.  There are many people who see negotiation as an opportunity to do better than their opponent, to win or to get the upper hand.  I am not suggesting that is unethical – after all we all want to do well when negotiating – but when does that desire to win become ‘to win at all costs’ and give way to behaving in an underhand manner?

There have been many books (and guest speaker tours) built on the idea that its not only possible, but acceptable to trick your way into winning every(?) negotiation.  Ploys have been used for as long as negotiation has existed, to manipulate the outcome of deals, leaving the person on the receiving end with a foul taste in their mouths as they question how they managed to sign up to such a bad deal.

We teach ploys in our workshops for one reason only – to understand them and be able to neutralise them.  We show you how to turn an unpleasant ploy into nothing more than an uncomfortable suggestion.

A wider issue though, is would it put you off doing business with them entirely?  Discovering the person you are negotiating with is trying to be underhand to get the better of you, would surely make you question if you wanted to work with them at all?

In some circumstances there is no option, but at least you can counter their ploys and keep the deal on a level playing field.  In other situations, I suggest acting without ethics can be instrumental in the destruction of your reputation (as a person or a business), and can make potential buyers, sellers or clients think twice before coming back for more.

I have had personal experience of it, and on both occasions I have walked away from the deal, believing that if they are trying to manipulate me now, how can I trust them for the rest of the contract term?

It’s not a very good long term plan, so next time you might be thinking of taking advantage of a mistake or using a ploy to manipulate the deal, may I suggest you consider the relationship you wish to have with the other side.  If you want them to come back or tell others to come to you, just don’t do it.  Think success, not just winning.